I was so looking forward to my India trip.. after 3 yrs of Covid isolation going to my parents house, visiting my birth country , fantasizing touch down to Pune , Mumbai, witnessing it firsthand was paramount and nothing could stand in its way , such was my resolve.

So I landed on Dec 14th leaving San Francisco and my home town Dublin far behind. I travelled without family so here I am ready to explore my roots , experience the beat of my homeland . I will write a monologue here some conversations that I had to lay out the perspectives on aging, coming home , modern India, food and transitions.

Nutan (Sister in Law): Welcome to Mumbai! So many things have changed since we last met, we got our house renovated lucky to have it completed just before Indias lockdown began during the fatal 2nd wave of Corona. The carefully selected color palette , hand picked furniture, a spacious kitchen and study for Pranav gives me a sense of togetherness. My home remodeling project kept me busy plus now I have another beauty parlor to care for. Pranav is preparing for his 10th, Umesh is busy with his work. Mom has turned 75 but the irony is she lost her 2 brothers one after the other just around her birthday and with that blow she has aged even more. I have several grays in my hair and an increasing waistline. Welcome and so good to see you.

I thanked Nutan for her amazing fish curries, fish fry and chicken and also for working on my beauty needs , polishing up a bit on hairdo and skin in her parlor before I headed out to Pune, Satish came to pick me up.

Satish( Our Driver): You are visiting after a long time Tai , how is Jiju, Shreeya and Arya? My older girl goes to Marathi medium as English is little tough for her but younger son is learning English and doing well in school. Tai do you want chai from “Dutta”. We can detour on our way to Pune. We always stop there for a little break. My wife no longer takes order for Chapattis. I told her to just concentrate on the kids. By Gods grace we have enough. The only complain they have is since we bought Maruti we haven’t really gone anywhere on a vacation perhaps I will take them somewhere for a day or two around 14th Feb to celebrate my birthday with family.

While Satish was telling me about his life I was wondering how things keep moving ahead and as they unfold our past builds up in front of our own eyes.

Dad: Welcome home beta , make yourself comfortable. Age is catching up but , I am still working at the age of 76. To tell you the truth Business is down and Mavshi’s demise is a major setback to our family. She was the support system that we could bank on in times of need but her passing make things look shadowy grim. My legs are not that strong and sometimes I wobble while walking. On the brighter side we got the house at our native place rebuilt in time. It feels good to go there in Ganpati and pay dues to our deity. It’s our legacy and somebody has to carry the torch and move ahead. Progress is good and necessary but faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase. Don’t forget my “Ravalnath” ever.

While I was there in India I was watching dad closely. Sometimes in the morning I would start my day by sweeping our little garden admiring the flowers and plants that keep my parents company. The creepers and the long standing shrubs quietly were saying to me see how tall and strong we have grown that we can shelter and shade the inhabitants. Aging is incredible , wrinkles will only go where the smiles have been. Dad was walking besides me looking for the newspaper. He sprayed it with disinfectant before taking it home.

Mom: Tai how are you .. why didn’t the kids come haven’t seen them for so long. How is Ganesh would have been nice if all of you would have come together. Now with age can’t do much around the house , but cooking and cleaning I still manage with the help of the bai. You guys go for the wedding , Papa and I will stay back , can’t handle larger crowds. It’s also safer that way. Tai this Thursday is “MargAshish” you can do the Puja , we will make “Puranpoli” for “Nevedya”. Tai come over for tea it’s the only time when daily chores haven’t caught up so we can relax and chit chat. TV is our only entertainment in the evening, come you also watch Marathi serials. They only run for half an hour.

During my entire stay in India I slept in moms bedroom. Proximity to her was my goal, hovering around to see how she operates. It was rediscovering motherhood. After lunch our kamvali Mavshi would do the cleaning and leave the kitchen spic and span. Not only did I bond with my parents but also with every room of the house as I cleaned and organized a little bit each day. The people and things around looked different, older so sprinkling a little pixie dust would perhaps heal, rejuvenate, transform the grayness to silver.

Siddhesh: Taidya we will be leaving for Kankavli on Tuesday. We can celebrate Mom and Dads wedding anniversary in Goa at a seaside restaurant along with Akshata’s Aai and Baba. It would be a befitting treat for them after a long standing wait of so many years. Once we get back from Kankavli we have only a day or two in between to shop for Sumeet’s wedding. So let’s make the most of it. Remind me to buy footwear for Mommy .. she likes them from the mall.

Such was Sid’s enthusiasm and rightly so. He has always been like that dashing, fun loving, stylish with the aura of a king. Akshata and Ayu’s energy make the trio unbeatable players. The day they reached Pune everything started throbbing with energy and life. My time with Ayu was magical. Often he called me “Bad boy Attu”. There has never been any title better than those 3 syllables.

We left for our native place and I stayed with my in-laws for a day. “Tulsa bhavan” felt tranquil. My in-laws are getting older too , same story as my parents. Their pulsating wrinkled hands, a little bend in the back mirrors grace and wisdom.

Akshata: Tai let’s go and get some fresh vegetables from Kankavli market. On our way back we can also get some fresh lime soda. I like to come here often it brings back good old childhood memories.

Akshata was maneuvering the way .. the leader she is through and through. Her confidence , grace and her ability to be one with the crowd is commendable. After all she was the only one who could speak fluent Malvani and gel with the natives.

We came back to Pune and were eagerly waiting for Namita and Aarohi to join us. I was very excited to see my niece after a long time. Aarohi is gorgeous and super talented. Namita and I met all our relatives when we went to Sumeets haldi and wedding.

Namita: Tai look at the beautiful costumes, hairdo , makeup and theme based jewelry. The couple is so simple compared to the extravagant crowd. Our marriages were so subdued and underplayed. The millennials have redefined the standards and infused stardom, glamour in any event shelling out not just money but time, marketing ,advertisement and well executed plans.

Namita is a natural leader. She is the middle one connecting the old with the new. Her sense of fashion, networking, ingenuity makes her the favorite go to person. We all went to Mahabaleshwar to celebrate 31st in a villa up the hills. The food , the ambience, the cooks all made it so memorable with the extended family.

In every family there is a giver with outstretched palms and a zest to put others before one’s own self. On our side of family my dad qualifies for it and on Akshata’s side in addition to her dad it is undoubtedly Kamlesh. As my dad says “Kamlesh shivay maja nahi.” There was so much to learn from the Sawant’s. I had the good fortune of being in their company and learning from them that at the end of the day what matters is the ordinary magic of life ( mulyachi bhaji , ambolya and chicken that Akshatas mom served us or the jokes that her dad kept telling us throughout our journey)

The finale was my Moms 75th birthday Jan6th 2022 , the same day I had the flight back to US. With a heavy heart I board the plane replaying the nostalgic memories of my beautiful days yet eagerly looking forward to share these shades of gray with my near and dear ones in California. The gray had blended with other colors and turned into a rainbow.